Birth:

Long, long ago in the deepest darkest depths of your mother a young kinderspawn was being animated. Made up of sugar, spice, my dad, and everything you’ll never amount to be, this spawn (ME) would be the planet earth’s most manliest of the men, strongest of the strong, bravest of the brave, sexiest of the sexy, fastest of the fast, and wisest of the wise!

Life:

From when I was a wee lad up until the greatness that I am now I’ve  accomplished many great feats such as freeing slaves, inventing Post-Its™, time traveling, terrorizing japan whilst wearing my dinosaur suit, and removing The sword from the stone.

Present:

While most of the fun and excitement happened during my younger years I find myself to be rather exhausted nowadays. Considering I’ve been around the world and back 43 times I now reside in your typical office cubical bringing you (the viewers) the amazingness of BlackSheepCodex.

Over Heard:

“Even though I have a well respected position hear at the office I often find myself cleaning up after CatastroFUCK’s drunken disruptive behavior. Don’t ask… I only do it because I slept with his wife, am the father of his second child and feel bad.”