Want to know my opinion on the Twilight movies? You probably shouldn’t ask. But go on then. I think they’re insidious pop culture propaganda, a horrible, insipid load of tripe written by a hack author and propagated by shameless Hollywood moguls for gullible idiots.These books and films are terrible. Their fans obnoxious and irritating, the creator undeserving of acclaim or riches for her pulpy Mormon sermonizing. But their worst crime, is of course their gender politics. Creating a female protagonist and making her completely useless in every possible way, as well as clumsy, self obsessed and oblivious is already disturbing, but then have her only reason for existing, for breathing at all, is her boyfriend, who just happens to be a manipulative, controlling, abusive git, makes Twilight something truly fucked up.
Okay, BadBabbler, tell us how you really feel! Sorry, kids, I just can’t miss a chance, any chance to slag off these cinematic/literary turds. But that isn’t the reason we’re here is it? I’m here to bring you the news (sorta). Luckily for me and my ilk, there’s yet another reason not to see these films, and that is, you could have an epileptic fit. Sure you’d need to already be suffering from photosensitive epilepsy, but hell, do you really wanna take the chance?
A man from Salt Lake City relayed his experiences to ABC4, his name was not given because he was afraid he would lose his job.
“I didn’t really remember what happened after that, I think I blacked out. According to [my wife] I was shaking and mumbling different noises.”
I’d fire him, if he worked for me. But I’m horrible human being.
Admittedly the cases are isolated, but the fact that they all happen during the film’s birth climax makes me wonder. I have not, nor will ever see this film (without a Rifftrax) but sources seem to agree that the scene involves flashing images of red, black and white which may have triggered these fits. Though I choose to believe that, since this is happening during the birthing scene, that the men involved are having psychotic break downs having been forced to see the film in which a girl gives birth to a super strong telepathic vampire baby who breaks her spine, forcing her vampire husband to chew the baby out of the womb and then a werewolf falls in love with it, or something. Also, sorry, SPOILERS
Basically my overall point is, you Twilight fans should be ashamed of yourselves. Go read something with a healthy message, like the Harry Potter books, Hunger Games or Chaos Walking Trilogies. Save our faltering, so-called civilisation!