Nikon has just announced the new lineup of the Coolpix camera line. One of the sexy little snappers is just what we have all been waiting for, a pocket-size camera that doesn’t rely on that pixellated vomit they call digital zoom. So now when your taking pictures of the high school lacrosse team practicing in the park across the street you’ll have crisp and clean photos for your masturbation station.
“The Coolpix S9100 will be for those looking for large zoom in a small size. This camera will pack a whopping 18X optical zoom (via a 25 to 450-mm lens) yet still include a pocket-sized body, just 1.4-inches thick. The camera will perform 12.1-megapixel captures, 1080p30 video and offer a high-resolution (920,000 dot) 3-inch LCD. The Nikon Coolpix S9100 will be available in black, red and bronze for $329.95 in March.”
There’s also a compact design that uses an extremely powerful light collector for taking pictures in low light without flash.
“The Nikon Coolpix P300 is the company’s first Coolpix outfitted with a lens whose maximum aperture is f/1.8. This large aperture allows it to capture lot of light—great for shooting in low light without a flash. Full manual control over the aperture and shutter speed will be available. The lens’ full focal length is 24-100mm (4x optical zoom) and will do 12.2-megapixel captures, 1080p30 video capture and offer a high-resolution (920k dot) 3-inch LCD. The Nikon Coolpix P300 will sell for $329.95 in red, silver and black in March.”
That’s right, no more midnight sorority house runs with clunky night vision Head sets, just strategically place one of these bad boys on a shelf and click click click you’ve got all fap-able material you need. Me? I’m gonna set mine up in the pool room to get some cleavage…..eeeww fat man swim….well those are tits of a sort…*undoes zipper*